Food: Monster Butter Madness

Random

So it’s been a while since I mentioned anything about diet & nutrition on the trail.

I had been posting videos on my YouTube account (ThruHike4Freedom) until Google decided to make it difficult on tens of thousands of people by locking them out of their accounts. Thanks, Google! Now I can’t respond to the subscribers who are asking me, via my YouTube account, “Are you still on the trail? Are you still alive?”

I guarantee you guys I’m still breathing. I’m just not going to be able to load as many videos as I wanted to the remainder of the trip. I will let you know here, though, when I do upload a video. Thanks for your understanding, and if anyone knows how to crack the YouTube/Google mess they made, let me know. 

So, FOOOOD! 

As I may have mentioned before, a thru-hiker on the PCT could potentially  lose some weight along the way to completing the hike. Despite eating pretty well (Grizz & Leader both said I ate better than anyone they’d hiked with), I’ve lost 21 pounds. With 1,450 miles left to go until I run aground on the Canadian beachead of Manning Provincial Park. 

So to keep my caloric intake up, I’ve resorted to “Monster Butter”. I’m not sure what the real name if this creation is, but it’s worthy of a few names. Happy Butter…Monster Butter…

But it’s awesome. 

But, I do have to warn you: it’s potentially hazardous. I could see this creation literally stopping someone. From living. So here’s the official warning/disclaimer:

“**WARNING!!**”
Use of this product by anyone other than a thru-hiker of a major trail, or by a professional athlete, risks the potential of massive weight gain, arterial blockage and ultimately a sad and immobile life. Use at own risk! 🙂 (sorry, NASCAR, professional bowlers nor horse racing participants are not included in the definition of ‘professional athletes’)

MONSTER BUTTER 
– 16-18 ounce jar of peanut butter*
– 3-4 candy bars 
– 3-4 Oreo Cookies (single or Doublestuff)
– handful of crushed up nuts of your choice (I like Cashews)
– 3 ounces or so of honey
– 1 1/2 sticks of butter, softened
(yes, STICKS, not spoonfuls…full sticks!)

* (the type of nut butter isn’t limited just to peanut…almond, hazelnut, cashew, etc. are all good options)

Scoop out about 1/4 to 1/3 of the peanut butter

Add in warmed honey

Dump in warmed butter

Stir well!

Crumble in Oreos

Break into small pieces the candy bars and add into jar as well

Mix!

You’re ready to eat. 

There’s other variations, as well: make a breakfast version with less chocolate, but add granola & more honey. Add a little cinnamon, brown sugar, or even maple syrup. 

Want a kick in the morning? Vanilla-Caramel coffee, ground up, mixed in with honey, chocolate…

Skies the limit. So is the potential waistline of whoever eats this stuff!

But in my effort to keep quick, effective, portable energy coursing through my body, making each mile possible, drastic times call for drastic (and delicious!) measures! 

But with the average person, this concoction isn’t a very health conscious idea. If I was not hiking the PCT right now, I wouldn’t be downing one of these every 4-5 days like I currently am. As it is now, my complexion is great, my skin isn’t greasy at all, and my weight has stabilized. 🙂

And it tastes amazing! The chocolate (I go Hersheys Almond + Hersheys Cookies & Cream or Twix) mixed with the honey, and butter…it makes the peanut butter stickiness become lighter and less gummy. 

Happy (?) eating!!

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